Anyone who’s ever been to an embarrassing recruitment day or dull dinner party will know that it’s always wise to have a fun fact about yourself at the ready, and I reckon mine’s pretty good: I’ve been up and down the Eiffel Tower 100 times.

I earned this honour when I spent a few unforgettable months working as a tour guide in Paris. I started on the beginner’s monument – “The Tower”, as it’s known in the biz, before going on to haul tourists around Versailles, Notre Dame and the winding streets of Montmartre.

I had pictured myself sauntering around Paris in a beret regaling riveted travellers with tales of the impressionists and Hemingway – the reality turned out to be far less glamorous, much...